Menopause, Auras, Surprises, and More Surprises

I'm a bit of a control freak, and I like to be in charge. Not because I like to boss people around, but because I need to know what's going on at all times. With that being said, the past year and a half to two years has been full of me feeling like I'm not in control.
(Warning- things are about to get personal, so if "lady talk" isn't your cup of tea, you may want to stop reading now).
For the past couple of years  I've weathered through a bout of depression, weight gain, mood swings, irregular cycles (even with pills), and crazy hormonal skin issues that can only be found in pubescent girls. I has self diagnosed myself as going through "The Change", but my husband couldn't & wouldn't  be convinced. I took my new state of womanhood, and declared that it was our sign that the Parchment Family was complete. 3 boys, all potty trained and semi self sufficient- it was a no brainer. We were moving on & we were never looking back. Goodbye late night feedings, strollers, diaper bags, onesies, and baby beds. Hello sleeping in, video games, stinky boys, and cooking meals large enough to feed the Salvation Army.

• Early January 2015

We are lunching at the park one Sunday in January, and while on a potty break with the youngest I encounter an older woman.

Stranger: Your glowing......Congratulations.
Me: Thank You! (then immediately come to my senses on what she is saying). Oh, No, I'm not expecting, I'm just chubby!!!"
Stranger: Oh honey, you have the Aura. You're expecting. (And she proceeds to walk out of the bathroom, never to be seen again).

Excuse me- What?! I had just encountered one of the most bizarre situations of my life, and apparently, this old woman had no idea that I was going through "The Change", still having monthly cycles and on birth control. Since I was so good at self diagnosing, I took it upon myself to declare that this poor woman was certified crazy. I made it back to the table with Nugget and told my husband (quietly) about what had happened- the last thing we needed was for the boys to overhear and start some kind of rumor, or better yet, get worked up about a sibling that they would never have. Later in the day, I realized what the woman was talking about....my new Nephew!! He would be here any day now & we were super excited for his arrival. Maybe this lady WAS "gifted"!

• Early February 2015

Fast forward a month and I go in for my annual checkup. Chitchatting with the nurses who are like family, we catch up on the past year: how big my boys have gotten, the possibility of a "Tubal",  my certainty that I am going through "The Change", my new Nephew who made me an aunt for the 1st time, and the "Gifted" lady at the park who had seen his pending arrival!! In the exam room my Doctor and I have an identical conversation  (with more emphasis on the tubal and him assuring me that I was not going through "The Change"). We bid our farewells and "see ya next year", and I am left to gather my things. After a few min (from inside the changing room), I hear my Doctor come back in the room:

Doctor: Kylea, you've got to see this!
Me: What?!? (peeking out of the door)
Doctor: It's Positive!! (while holding out this plastic thingamabob)
Me: For What!?! (at this moment my mind has gone to the worst things imaginable...Cancer? An STD? Oh God, I was right- The Change).
Doctor: It says you're pregnant!

After that point everything is a blur. There was no way. I'm a responsible 30 something who takes her birth control daily (like clock work), I hadn't been sick, or on any form of antibiotics......and I know that risks associated with 4 C-sections is a scary thing.
I remember him leading me over to the exam table & handing me a trash can because all of the color had drained from my body. There was mention of him not believing it, because he had saw no indication that would make him think I was pregnant. He mentioned "false positives" & chemical pregnancies. I was told to stop taking my pills immediately and come back in 2 weeks so that we could figure our what was really going on.
I gathered my thoughts & went to schedule my follow up apt. I peeked my head out to the waiting room, and motioned for the hubs to come back so I could tell him ( Without the boys hearing and also in the event that he passed out I would at least have some type of medical profession that could help me).

Me: Ummm, the say I'm Pregnant
Hubs: (calm as a cucumber) O.K.
Me: (panicked) Did you hear me!?!? They think I'm Pregnant!!
Hubs: (slams hand on table) WELL WHOSE IS IT?!?!
Me: What!?!?!
Hubs: (Laughing) I'm kidding, It's fine. Really.

Mortified, I make my appointment for two weeks later, and leave the office.

• Mid February 2015

I go to my follow up appointment to see what it is really going on with my body. I don't feel pregnant, I'm not sick, and I'm convinced once again that something is wrong with me. It's all I've thought about for 2 weeks. We start with an ultrasound, and there it is- A Baby. No a blob, or a "peanut", but an actual baby with a heartbeat! With no indication of when this even happened, they have to gage the baby's gestation on measurements alone- 12 weeks! Its one shock after another. A baby, and it will be here in late August! I get lots of pictures to share with the family and leave the office in shock. This year is supposed to be about my new nephew....this is HIS time, and now I'm fixing to rain on his parade. This "season" was over for me & we were done- a new chapter had begun.
Later that night, we go home and let the our family (including the boys) know "the news". The boys are in disbelief, but ecstatic and their excitement eases my fears a bit.

• Mid April 2015

The weeks are flying by. I've still not fully accepted that we will be a family of 6. As we approach the "Big" Ultrasound my nerves get the best of me. I went 12 weeks without knowing or taking care of myself. I KNOW its another Boy, I just want to know that everything is OK.
On April 13th we go in to make sure everything is going good- and just maybe if the baby cooperates we can verify the sex (BOY). Baby's organs & brain look great & are functioning as they should. Measurements look good, aside for some smaller measurements for baby's legs.

Tech: (To the boys) Do you guys want to know if you are getting a brother or sister?
Boys: YES!!
Ellis: Its a Boy
Emmitt: Boy
Eizach: Girl
Hubs: Just healthy
Me: It's a Boy.
Tech: It's a Sister.
Me: Huh?! Are you sure?
Tech: Positive. See that line right there... its a girl.
Me: Oh. My. Word.

The geneticist comes in to re-look at SISTERS legs. They are measuring a bit small, so they want us to come back in 4 weeks to just make sure they are growing.

We leave & head to Nashville West so The Parchment Brothers can buy something for their SISTER . We have 4 months to go from Wrestling, Guts, & Grossness to Pink, Glitter, and Glamorous.

• Mid May 2015

Sister follow up. Her legs are growing, but still measuring behind. No one seems to be concerned. (Hello, have you seen my legs?!) The hubs and I aren't the tallest of people.... heck, I cling tight to that 1/2 inch when I tell people that I'm 5ft & 1/2 an inch. I ask for a "double check" and they insist, baby is still a She. Oy.

• Early July- Early Aug 2015

Preeclampsia symptoms set in. Paired with my age of 34 & this being a 4th c-section I'm now considered "High Risk". Multiple Ultrasounds (with confirmations that this baby is indeed still a sister) & hospital visits.
We buy girly and/or pink everything and if it has glitter Ellis considers it a "Must Buy". I'm terrified. Those who know me, know that "Girlie" was never my thing. No pink, No Dresses, No Dolls (except for GI Joe & Jem and the Holograms). If it wasn't outdoors or sports related, I wasn't having it. I was in a whole new world and so grateful for the hubs and these boys- because they were totally in to buying for this girl. She was going to be so loved.

Aug 19th was going to be here before we knew it. Little did we know..........